Night of Open Sex (1983)

As 1983 dawned, Jess Franco was a man on a mission… He was going to make 16 movies.

Let that set in. SIXTEEN MOVIES. Quentin Tarantino won’t make 16 movies in his career. Okay, sure, one or two of them were not directed by him, but he produced and/or wrote them. What the fuck ever. He was making more than one movie a month. Okay, sure, most of them didn’t have much of a budget, or much of a costuming department, or a story. What the fuck ever. He was plowing through movies on his way to his most productive year in his incredibly productive career.

So, in February of 1983, he released one of those 16 flicks in Spain – Night of Open Sex. This is our fourth entry in Lina Romay Month here at B-Movie Enema, and this one might be a doozy. You see, Night of Open Sex isn’t quite like the previous entries this month. Oh no. This movie is actually a Eurospy thriller comedy caper. How does any of that work? I dunno, but here we are.

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Sinfonia Erotica (1980)

Well, last week’s launch of Lina Romay Month was bonkers, huh?

Well, buckle up, kiddos… This week’s B-Movie Enema is Sinfonia Erotica. Another Jess Franco/Lina Romay joint. Another Marquis de Sade story turned into a filthy little Spanish movie. However, what are we looking at in terms of “filthy”?

Will this be like last week? Well, that’s hard to say. In Cries of Pleasure, about half the movie was full of our main sex weirdos completely nude and doing various sex with each other. I’m pretty close to 100% sure there was actual sex being performed during the filming. While we didn’t see the actual penetration like we did in some of the past adult films I’ve covered on here before, that doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.

What might be key to note here is the year in which Cries of Pleasure or Sinfonia Erotica were release.

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Cries of Pleasure (1983)

This month, B-Movie Enema is going to dive into some Lina Romay movies. Ms. Romay was kind of interesting in her own right. Maybe made more interesting by the man she served as muse to – Jess Franco. Now, I’ve covered one of their movies before – Two Female Spies with Flowered Panties. We’re doing it again with this week’s look at 1983’s Cries of Pleasure. I delved into a little bit of their relationship with Two Female Spies, but I think it might be a good idea to review that as we jump into this month that features a bunch of stuff from them.

Franco had been inspired by (and infatuated with) Soledad Miranda in the late 60s. The pair made a few movies and he saw her as the only possible star for his films. She tragically died in an automobile accident in 1970. A destroyed and heartbroken Franco would soon find his new leading lady in the teenaged Lina Romay. She was married at the time, as was Franco, but as they continued to work on numerous projects and spent much time together, they soon were inseparable. By the end of the 70s, Franco and Romay were living together, and would until the end of her life in 2012. Franco passed away about 14 months later.

The duo made dozens of movies together during his heyday of the 70s, through his downturn in the 80s, and even some of his adult films in the 90s.

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He Knows You’re Alone (1980)

Just a couple weeks ago, I did an article on Savage Weekend. That’s a much maligned slasher that often gets a bad reputation for being a poor horror film with bad characters. I didn’t have that same opinion. In fact, I rather liked it.

Or, rather, there was one particular person in the movie that I rather liked – Caitlin O’Heaney.

In the world of horror, this week’s featured flick, He Knows You’re Alone, is the one Ms. O’Heaney is best known for. She has an interesting life. She was a trained and schooled as a stage actress. She eventually landed on television in mostly guest star roles and a handful of smaller roles in film. However, before all that began, she did receive an offer from Salvador Dali to model for him for a particular project, but Dali’s wife would ultimately poo pooed the project and it was canceled. She’s also a supporter of environmental and animal rights issues. She’s also a designer of fragrances. She ultimately designed a fragrance that has some not-so-insignificant fans (including the likes of Paula Abdul and Terri Hatcher).

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The Apple (1980)

There are movies that are bad. There are movies that are REALLY bad. Then there’s The Apple.

The Apple was Cannon Films co-owner Menahem Golan’s fever dream of a passion project. Right there, you see it? You see the three red flags of that statement? First, Cannon Films. They were the schlock studio of all schlock studios of the 80s. They cranked out movie after movie of fodder that I could cover on this site. In fact, I have! I could very easily load this blog of Cannon articles week after week after week. It is almost unfair to every other movie ever made.

Then you have Menahem Golan. Here’s a guy who is fairly fascinating. He’s not a bad idea guy. He knew how to sell his movies. He knew how to crank out that schlock onto cable, video stores, and movie theaters – all over the world. The problem was that he didn’t have very good, completely well-thought out ideas. He had almost no concept of nuance. Anyone outside the United States is either an enemy or a weak-willed wimp in the face of terrorism. Chuck Norris shows up and kills everything, but, because some of those people he killed were indeed bad guys, he is right. That’s the mindset of Menahem Golan.

Then, there’s the concept of a passion project.

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Savage Weekend (1980)

We have ourselves a treat for this week’s new B-Movie Enema. Savage Weekend is NOT a well liked movie. In fact, David Paulsen’s made-in-1976, sent-to-Cannes-in-1978, released-by-Cannon-in-1980 exploitation horror is so disliked, I think it would be a good idea to see what some of the reviews have been.

First up is TV Guide: “A truly reprehensible exploitation film… Ultra-low budget and shot on grainy color stock, the film is borderline pornography, and the gore effects are extremely gruesome.” I’m not sure what the problem is here, TV Guide. Borderline pornography, gruesome gore effects? Sounds pretty good to me.

Next is Ed Blank from The Pittsburgh Press: “Incoherent and inept.” Eek. What else you have, Mr. Blank? “Sexist in nature featuring female characters who serve no other purpose other than to appear in various stages of undress and back up against walls and trees so they can be slain or tied up.” Again, what’s the issue here? Hmmm… Let’s try one more.

From Joe Baltake of the Philadelphia Daily News: “[Nicky, the gay character] is the foulest movie character of recent memory, enough to set gay rights activism back several decades… It’s still not clear to me whether Paulsen wanted to make a soft-core porno film, a horror movie, or a combination of both. It’s not clear because he’s failed at all three.”

Okay, that last one was pretty funny.

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B-Movie Enema: The Series Episode #2 – My Mom’s a Werewolf

It’s the second episode of the smash new series – B-Movie Enema! This week, Dr. Geoff Arbuckle, B-Movie Proctologist extraordinaire, and his trusty sidekick, Nurse Disembaudee, watch the fun 1989 monster comedy My Mom’s a Werewolf!

Or watch on YouTube on the B-Move Enema Channel!