Moonshine County Express (1977)

This is a bit of a wonderful confluence of things B-Movie Enema likes an awful lot. Moonshine County Express was a New World Pictures release, so that brings Roger Corman to us. Next, Claudia Jennings is in this and it’s generally accepted as one of her finest roles in her all too brief career. Finally, it’s the long awaited return of website girlfriend Candice Rialson.

That trio, and, frankly, those two lovely ladies alone, would be something worth celebrating. However, there are other facets to this movie that is quite notable. First, this stars the recently departed John Saxon. He passed away in July of 2020 and was laid to rest in Seattle in the same cemetery as Bruce and Brandon Lee. He had decades of film roles that included being in Enter the Dragon with Bruce Lee, starring in the original A Nightmare on Elm Street, and, of course, playing the werewolf in My Mom’s a Werewolf. He was a bad ass.

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She (1985)

She told me that she loved me, and like a fool I believed her from the start. She said she’d never hurt me, but then she turned around and broke my heart. Why am I standing here missing her and wishing she were here?

She only did me wrong. Hey! I’m better off alone. She devoured all my sweet love, took all I had and then she fed me dirt. She laughed while I was crying. It was such a joke to see the way it hurt.

Wait… What’s that? We’re not talking about the opening song to the 1967 album More of The Monkees written by Tommy Boyce and Bobby Hart? But we’re talking about She right? Ohhhh, the 1985 post-apocalyptic comedy action flick starring Sandahl Bergman? Ah ha! I gotcha. That does seem to better fit the B-Movie Enema blog website than individual songs on random albums from, like, almost 55 years ago.

Well, shit… Let’s change gears then, yes?

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Vampirella (1996)

In 1969 (heh heh), Forrest J. Ackerman, creator of the publication Famous Monsters of Filmland, and artist Trina Robbins created a new superhero of sorts in the shapely form of female vampire from the planet Drakulon named Vampirella. Vampirella’s origin would later be updated to have her become the daughter of Lilith. For those like me who never grew up with religiosity, Lilith was a demonic figure from Biblical Hebrew. She was Adam’s first wife before Eve came along. She’s become quite an icon in Wiccan belief and modern Occultism.

But we’re not here to talk about Lilith. We’re here to talk about her sort of, later, maybe baby daughter Vampirella!

Vampirella’s book was published by Warren Publishing who also published horror mags Eerie and Creepy. While she would feature and headline the comic in her own adventure, the book was actually an anthology. She would host other horror short stories to fill out the rest of the book. She would get various appearances and published by companies over the years and is currently among some of the cult followed figures that get regular appearances in various Dynamite Entertainment books.

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Hard Ticket to Hawaii (1987)

Well, this is very much overdue, but here we are – a return to the world of Andy Sidaris.

Almost five whole years ago, B-Movie Enema took a ride on the Malibu Express. It was always my intention to start plowing through the Sidaris filmography, but there was an issue right away. This week’s movie, Hard Ticket to Hawaii, is very, very well covered – which is funny because the girls in this movie are hardly covered at all (note to self: insert rimshot). All kidding aside, Hard Ticket to Hawaii is the one movie in the Sidaris library that pretty much everyone knows.

Between being covered by RedLetterMedia on one of the very earliest episodes of Best of the Worst, it already having been covered by the gang at How Did This Get Made, and having been featured in just about every possible podcast that ever pod casted, it’s not one that has much more room for commentary. Shit, in 2014, Paste Magazine called it THE best B-movie of all time. High praise indeed. But, alas, here I am. If I had acted sooner, I wouldn’t have had to keep putting it off because of its popularity, but I had so many other things to cover back in those early days of this blog. What… Did you think the 1968 William Shatner/Adam West version of Alexander the Great was going to cover itself?

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Doc Savage: The Man of Bronze (1975)

Every now and then, I like to do a thing for me on B-Movie Enema. You know, like one that is in honor of, well, me? That’s what we have here with this movie. This week, I’m going to dive into the 1975 pulp action hero adventure Doc Savage: The Man of Bronze!

Why this movie? It’s really obvious when you break apart the title. I’m sort of a doctor. I am the Enema Man! So, yeah. I don’t know if you have to be a doctor, but look at some of the early articles on this blog or my YouTube show for further reference of my credentials. Second, I’m relatively savage. You want further proof of my savage nature? Check out what I had to say about Pot Zombies. I still get irrationally angry at the thought of that turd.

Third, I assume most people think I’m a man. Some people may even think I’m THE man! And lastly, yes, I am a man of bronze. My buttery colored skin is a sight to behold and something that women desire and men desire to have.

So yes, I’m a barrel-bellied man of action, and THAT’S why I am dedicating this movie to my life mate and partner – me!

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Blood Debts (1985)

Welcome back to B-Movie Enema!

This week, it’s time to do a truly dumb bonkers of an action flick – Teddy Page’s Blood Debts. Teddy Page is a Filipino film director who wrote from time to time. He is mostly known for working on low budget action flicks for Silver Star Film Company. The primary claim to fame for Silver Star Film Company is that they made very, very low budget movies. Page, whose real name is Teddy Chiu, would get hired to crank out these cheap-o movies, but he would get a little bit of an ace in the hole from producer K.Y. Lim’s Silver Star – he’d get some established actors.

Chief among them in a few early Page films was Richard Harrison. He was a former Spaghetti Western and Sword and Sandal star who racked up over 130 credits. A whole bunch of these credits, like Blood Debts, came in the 80s. This was considered a real low point in his career. What didn’t help him much was when he reunited with Chinese filmmaker Godfrey Ho. By this point in Ho’s career, he would make these cut-and-paste type of ninja movies. He’d get the rights to a film already made, cut them in half, hire actors to make another full movie, cut them in half, and create these full movies. Harrison didn’t so much mind getting work, he did end up being in WAY more movies than he signed up for, thus making him frustrated and an unwilling star of twice as many really low-grade movies.

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Truck Stop Women (1974)

This promises to be a fun one this week, Enemaniacs! We’re going to talk about the 1974 action/drama Truck Stop Women. On the surface, this just seems like one of the many movies in the 70s that highlighted sexy women, truckin’, and car chases. But there’s a bit more to it than that.

You see, the basic plot is that a woman named Anna, played by Lieux Dressler, runs a brothel for truckers to stop by. One of the stable of women at said brothel is her daughter Rose, played by the always wonderful Claudia Jennings. That alone already seems kind of interesting and enticing. However, who made this movie is just as interesting and enticing…

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Resident Evil (2002)

Oh boy.

So here’s a movie I’ve wanted to talk about in some way, shape, or form since I got into this Enema business – Paul W.S. Anderson’s Resident Evil. But why? Why would I want to dive deep into this series? Well, there are lots of reasons I can think of. First, it’s a movie based on a video game series. The genre of video game movies are lousy with movies that are, well, lousy.

Second, Paul W.S. Anderson himself. Look, I like his Event Horizon. I thought that movie was creepy, fun, and fine enough despite its bad reviews. I know people feel the same way about his follow up film Soldier. I didn’t see that one. Mortal Kombat… Eh… That’s a bad movie. It is a very, very bad, bad movie. That said, it’s kind of fun in its shitliness.

Third, I saw this movie. I was working at a movie theater on March 15, 2002 when this film came out. I saw it. It was bad. It was a big, dumb, bad action movie. But it made a shitload of money. Piles of dough was thrown at this movie by its fans. Five sequels later, people freaking love this movie and series. All this from a really bad movie that is kind of emblematic of the entire first decade of movies that launched the 21st century.

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