Category: 1980s

Death Warmed Up (1984)

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It’s time for another shambling review here at B-Movie Enema!

We don’t cover New Zealand enough around here, if I’m being honest. The islands that make up the southern hemisphere nation have made quite a splash in film over the last 40+ years. While it’s unfair to tie New Zealand’s film legacy to Australia’s, it might be fair to say that after the rise of Australian cinema in the 70s, New Zealand was able to follow suit and offer its own blend of plots, concepts, and quirks to film audiences.

What’s kind of interesting, this site has been full of Kiwi products over the last year and a half. In March of last year, I looked at Peter Jackson’s adult take on The Muppet Show, 1989’s Meet the Feebles. The wonderful 1985 science fiction drama, The Quiet Earth, came to the site in the form of a review in July. Then, in August of last year, the 70th episode of B-Movie Enema: The Series hopped in our Battletruck to watch Warlords of the 21st Century. All three of those movies have their own qualities that are fun, thought-provoking, or just outright weird. Now, it’s time to discuss another Kiwi film of note – David Blyth’s 1984 sci-fi zombie flick, Death Warmed Up.

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Scared to Death (1980)

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AAAAAAHHHHHHH!

Wow, guys. I am really Scared to Death this week. Welcome to a new review here at B-Movie Enema.

If you would, think back to December of last year. I reviewed the movie The Deadly Spawn. That little 1983 sci-fi horror flick was quite fun. By absolute accident, the following week, I covered Metamorphosis: The Alien Factor. What I didn’t realize at the time I scheduled those two reviews to be done, months ahead of being published, was that they were from the same series. The Deadly Spawn was the original. Metamorphosis is a sort of sequel. Well, this year, while not scheduled back-to-back, I have scheduled two more films that are related to each other – 1980’s Scared to Death and the 1990 sequel Syngenor.

This time, they are much closer in connection.

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Primal Rage (1988)

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Welcome to this animalistic new review at B-Movie Enema!

This week, we’re looking at one of those classic Italian movies that wants to be an American horror film, 1988’s Primal Rage. Those are fun, aren’t they? This one comes from a couple of names of pretty decent note. First, you have director Vittorio Rambaldi. He’s a bit of a nepo baby. His father, Carlo, was a two-time Academy Award-winning visual effects maestro. He won for 1979’s Alien and 1982’s E.T. the Extra-Terrestial. Carlo Rambaldi had a third nomination for 1976’s King Kong. By the way, that’s my very favorite King Kong too. Look at Jessica Lange, in her big screen debut, and tell me it’s not the most beautiful of all the versions of that tale.

While Carlo would go on to do the effects for the awful King Kong Lives, he would end his career on this film for his son. Interestingly, though, I can only think of one thing Carlo would create for this movie, but we’ll get there when we get there. The last name Rambaldi would not be the only major Italian name associated with this movie, though.

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The Unseen (1980)

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Welcome to a killer new review here at B-Movie Enema.

This week, we’re looking at an early 80s film that I think has a little underground cult appeal. We’re going to discuss 1980’s The Unseen from director Danny Steinmann. Steinmann is likely a name horror fans will recognize, even though, for The Unseen, he used the credit Peter Foleg. Like with last week’s movie, Carnosaur, which had special effects done by Friday the 13th Part VI: The New Blood director John Carl Buechler, Steinmann is also a Camp Crystal Lake alum. In 1985, he co-wrote and directed his final film, Friday the 13th: A New Beginning. By far, that is Steinmann’s most famous movie, for better or worse.

I don’t envy the guy who had to make the only other movie without Jason Voorhees in the franchise after the character became the most defining part of the series.

After getting his start in the 70s in the adult industry, directing the porno High Rise in 1973, Steinmann didn’t really do much with film for another seven years when he crossed over into the mainstream with The Unseen. At least, he wasn’t in the director’s chair or writing scripts. He did work as an assistant on 1975’s The Man in the Glass Booth and a 1977 TV movie for Gene Roddenberry’s Spectre.

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The Order of the Black Eagle (1987)

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Hey there, Enemaniacs, and welcome to another review here at B-Movie Enema.

Say, do you remember that time I reviewed that James Bond ripoff that was made in North Carolina and was made pretty much by a bunch of North Carolinians? You know the one I’m talkin’ about. Yeah, the one with the guy named Duncan Jax, and he had a baboon buddy named Boon. That’s the one! That one was Unmasking the Idol, and it was not so much unmasked but unearthed by Vinegar Syndrome some years ago and given a nice new shiny Blu-ray release.

A year later, in 1987, after making one James Bond ripoff, director Worth Keeter, along with screenwriter Phil Behrens, decided to run it back and do it again. That’s what I’m reviewing this week, the sequel to Unmasking the Idol, still with Duncan Jax and, most importantly, Boon the Baboon, The Order of the Black Eagle. Interestingly, Wikipedia and the movie’s own promotional stuff title this movie Order of the Black Eagle, while IMDb lists it as THE Order of the Black Eagle. Why the use of the definite article on IMDb but nowhere else? I dunno. Who do you think I am, some sort of investigative blogger?

You should know by now that I do the bare minimum when it comes to investigative work.

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The Burning (1981)

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Welcome to a new B-Movie Enema review, and welcome to the official start of summer.

Yeah, you read the right, bitches. I say when summer starts. And it starts right now as we say goodbye to May this weekend and hello to June. With the warmer months, traditionally speaking, people start taking vacations in various ways. Families might plan trips to lakes to go boating and maybe fish or something. They may plan on going to Disney World. The days get longer and the movies get more fun and entertaining (for better or worse). Parents are ready, after a long, grueling school year dealing with piss poor report cards and parent-teacher conferences, to send their kids to a camp to get them out of their goddamn hair for a few weeks.

That desire to make your kids someone else’s problem gave birth to two very distinctly 80s subgenres in movies. The first were comedies like 1979’s Meatballs. The second, much more popular subgenre, was the slasher horror like 1980’s Friday the 13th. The latter is where this week’s featured movie, 1981’s The Burning, lies.

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Class of Nuke ‘Em High (1986)

Published on by Geoff Arbuckle2 Comments

Welcome back to Troma Month here at B-Movie Enema!

Last week, it just so happened, the month started with a leadoff home run with Tromeo and Juliet, a movie that I believe, by the time we finish this month and I’ve increased my viewership of movies made internally by Troma, will be the best film ever released by the company. I know, I know… Toxie and what have you. There was just something special about Tromeo and Juliet that had my by the balls and shook me about until I cried out for my mommy to save me.

Wait…

Eh… anyway… This week, we’re going back to the 80s when Troma and their fictional hometown of Tromaville was in its infancy. We’re looking at 1986’s Class of Nuke ‘Em High. This horror/sci-fi/comedy was Lloyd Kaufman’s follow-up to his seminal 1984 classic The Toxic Avenger. This time, though, he wasn’t alone. Kaufman shared directing duties with Troma editor Richard W. Haines.

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Surf Nazis Must Die (1987)

Published on by Geoff Arbuckle3 Comments

Welcome to a new review here at B-Movie Enema.

You know… It’s 2025. That means we’re soon a full 80 years since Nazi Germany was bumped off in the incredibly high-stakes game of Real Life Risk. We should feel really good about the concept of a pretty shit ideology like fascism or Nazism is long gone, right? I mean, I’m glad I can lay my head down on my pillow each and every night knowing that, as an American, I will never have to worry about some sort of terrible natural disaster hitting California and leaving it open to still operating Neo Nazi and far-right agitators to run amok. It sure is great to be 80 years removed from those possibilities, right?

What’s this I see in the news and on social media sites everywhere? California is consistently on fire and always open for a possible cataclysmic earthquake… The government is being run by people with fewer scruples than brain cells… The richest man in the world sure looks like he gave a Nazi salute behind a podium featuring the Presidential Seal of the United States of America… There seems to be no real response or much resistance from a pretty damn weak and limp-wristed Democratic Party in the face of this rising tide of extremist policy and pretty bad actors now running the government…

Well, FUCK. Anyway, here’s a review for 1987’s Surf Nazis Must Die.

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