Tag: comedy

Shag: The Movie (1989)

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It’s a new month and a new opportunity to have a new theme.

Back in December, I covered Alyssa Milano in a way that only a real creep, or possibly that undertaker character Tom Petty played in the “Last Dance with Mary Jane” video, could.  That was a way to look at the body of work of a 90s dream girl who blossomed into a girl who really liked making movies teenage boys liked to watch.  For April, I decided to step back to the 1980s and talk about another brunette vixen that boys love to this day – Phoebe Cates. Continue reading “Shag: The Movie (1989)” →

Clinger (2015)

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Okie doke.  It’s the end of March.  It’s also the point to which I have to take a break from all these Amazon Prime horror movies.  I wish I could say that Prime is the gift that keeps on giving, but man…  Each one of these is like I’m gambling.

Like I’m flopping my dickbag onto a little guillotine and then betting on Black on a Roulette wheel and hoping it doesn’t land on Red.  And if it lands on one of the green spots, well…  I don’t think I need to go into too much detail about where they’ll shove my newly severed saddle bag.

In my butt.  That’s where they’ll shove it. Continue reading “Clinger (2015)” →

Killer Eye: Halloween Haunt (2011)

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Well, because the sweet embrace of death didn’t come to pass last week, I guess I have to continue Full Moon Fever.  At least there’s a chick in her bra and panties on the cover of this week’s movie!

Er…  I mean.  That had zero bearing on me choosing this movie – Killer Eye: Halloween Haunt.  No, that was the $2.95 price tag at the local Dollar General.

And the promise of tits.  Lots and lots of tits. Continue reading “Killer Eye: Halloween Haunt (2011)” →

The Gingerdead Man (2005)

Published on by Geoff Arbuckle2 Comments

Shit.
Shit.
Motherfucker.
Goddammit.
Shit.
Monkey dick.
Motherdammit.
Godshitting monkeyfucker nutdick.

Full Moon Fever continues.  Last week, I had a good time watching the cult classic Puppet Master.  I felt like I really got to see something good for the first time in 2017.  But I just couldn’t stop there, could I? Continue reading “The Gingerdead Man (2005)” →

Killer Party (1986)

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Okay, maybe I overreached last week.  Mystics in Bali… Really?  Why did I pick a movie that was utterly nonsensical to the point of absurdity and something hardly anyone has seen?

Oh yeah, the floating head that sucked babies out of vaginas.

Let’s get back to something a little safer and a lot more fun.  After all, what’s better than a slasher film for Friday the 13th?  I will say, typing that felt weird.  It’s like maybe I should be talking about something else.  Hmmm.  Oh I dunno, I’m sure whatever that nagging sensation I’m feeling is just a buncha hooey. Continue reading “Killer Party (1986)” →

Firewalker (1986)

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Whoa-ho boy.  It’s been far too long since I last talked about a Cannon Films/Chuck Norris action flick, and I think now’s as good a time as any to revisit the 80s’ greatest hero.

For this week, I decided to cover the one Chuck Norris movie I’ve seen more than any other – Firewalker.  When I was a kid, this movie was on HBO or some other cable channel ALL THE TIME.  It’s just a good old fashioned Chuck Norris flick that tries so hard to be Indiana Jones.  Also Academy Award Winner Lou Gossett is there too.  And Melody Anderson who I think almost every guy my age had a crush on, thanks in no small part to Flash Gordon. Continue reading “Firewalker (1986)” →

Election Day Special: The Werewolf of Washington (1973)

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My fellow Americans…  In this time of strife, unrest, dangers from threats inside and outside our great nation, I call on you to do your civic duty and vote.  Don’t vote Democrat or Republican.  Libertarian or Green.  Vote Werewolf.  He is a man with voracity and spirit!  He is a man who would later appear on a cult classic television show about a guy who time travels by leaping into bodies and helping right historical wrongs.  As his poster says he “Makes it Perfectly Clear!”

Wait…  Whaaaaaaaaaaa? Continue reading “Election Day Special: The Werewolf of Washington (1973)” →

Malibu Express (1985)

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It’s time to dive into some Andy Sidaris.  And by “dive into some Andy Sidaris”, I pretty much mean to motorboat the shit out of its tits.

What can I say about Andy Sidaris and his movies?  Well, they usually feature stacked blondes.  They are, in some sort of way, connected in a shared universe.  Malibu Express kicks off the “L.E.T.H.A.L. Ladies” series that would continue for 11 more movies.  Each of these movies, except for this one, would see at least one recurring character come along to help out the crew of government lady agents. Continue reading “Malibu Express (1985)” →