B-Movie Proctologist Dr. Geoff goes on a bike ride with Nurse Disembaudee as they go searching for Werewolves on Wheels!
Author: Geoff Arbuckle
I write and talk about movies. Find me over at Film Seizure where I talk about nostalgic movies on a weekly podcast as well as have a weekly show about monster movies. I also write about B-Movies at my site B-Movie Enema!
Zorrita: Passion’s Avenger (2000)
Welcome back to B-Movie Enema, my lovely Enemaniacs!
This week’s movie, Zorrita: Passion’s Avenger, continues the march to the inevitable conclusion of Full Moon Fever: Torchlight Diaries! This entry comes from director Madison Monroe. Now, I will assume that Madison is a lady. I mean I suppose it could be a dude, but I prefer the idea of it being a lady. I assume that with a name like Madison Monroe, she probably looks like that one cheerleader for the football team that EVERY guy wanted to catch a glimpse of in the locker room if you catch my drift.
I do quite appreciate a typical cheerleader stereotype collecting towels and putting them in that big wheeled hamper thing that gets collected by equipment managers and then taken to the laundry room? I mean, she’s in the locker room because she works on the equipment side of the thing. She’s not a cheerleader at all. Also, she’s probably fully clothed in baggy sweatpants and a big ol’ sweatshirt or hoodie? By no means is she naked or in any way exposed. She’s just, mmmm, doing the thing with the laundry… Oh yeah. That’s it. Put it into the big wheeled hamper thingy, Madison. Do it slower next time. Oh yeah, Maddy baby…
Look, people, I have a VERY specific fetish.
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B-Movie Enema: The Series Episode #3 – Oasis of the Zombies
Things are rough for the third episode of B-Movie Enema as Geoff has to face the unfaceable and watch Jess Franco’s Oasis of the Zombies one more time.
Huntress: Spirit of the Night (1995)
Okay, so here we are in the third week of Full Moon Fever II: Torchlight Diaries and we’re done with the space babes for the month, but we’re not done with another reference I’ve been making all month long.
This week, I’m gonna take a look at Huntress: Spirit of the Night from 1995. This is about a family curse, some aristocratic family, and it appears to be about some mood. Now, that said, it’s still a mid 90s erotic thriller from Full Moon, so you can bet your ass that we’re gonna get a lot of sexy with that heaving mounds of mood. Oh yeah… That reference I said I would be making…
The film is directed by Mark Manos. Now, early on in his career he directed some episodes of Freddy’s Nightmares. In fact, he’s done a shitload of TV shows even as recently as the new MacGyver show and Interrogation. So that’s not for nuthin’. He did a handful of Full Moon’s horror movies, including their pseudo-superhero film Dark Angel: The Ascent, which I covered last fall. So he was a bit of Full Moon bullpen kind of guy.
But what else did he do?
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B-Movie Enema: The Series Episode #2 – My Mom’s a Werewolf
It’s the second episode of the smash new series – B-Movie Enema! This week, Dr. Geoff Arbuckle, B-Movie Proctologist extraordinaire, and his trusty sidekick, Nurse Disembaudee, watch the fun 1989 monster comedy My Mom’s a Werewolf!
Femalien (1996)
Alright, Full Moon Fever II: Torchlight Diaries is off and running thanks to last week’s check in with the Beach Babes. This week, we keep to the out of this world hotties with Cybil Richards’ 1996 erotic sci-fi flick Femalien.
Now, I want to say that I always think Cybil Richards is one of David DeCoteau’s many, many nom de plumes, but it actually isn’t. I don’t know if I’m excited or sad about that. On one hand, I’m betting Femalien doesn’t have a shit ton of dance scenes as she traipses across the galaxy and meeting new people and dealing with back pain. On the other hand, I’m betting there’s no bad jokes and shit.
Now, was this made on a slim budget of 27-30,000 McDonald’s cheeseburgers like so many of DeCoteau’s films looked to be?
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B-Movie Enema: The Series Episode #1 – Eyes Behind the Stars
It’s the first episode of B-Movie Enema: The Series! Join B-Movie Proctologist Geoff Arbuckle as he and his faithful companion, Nurse Disembaudee, as they watch the 1978 Italian sci-fi/horror/sort of thriller Eyes Behind the Stars!
Beach Babes 2: Cave Girl Island (1995)
Well, holy hot damn… This is the 250th B-Movie Enema article!
So what do I do to celebrate? I kick off a second month of “Full Moon Fever”. I covered a bunch of Full Moon movies back in February of 2017. But then, over the course of the past year or so, I started looking at some other types of movies from Charles Band’s production company. More specifically, I started checking out some of the offerings from Torchlight which was the spicy wing of Full Moon.
Beach Babes from Beyond was one that I chose to do. So, to kick off Full Moon Fever II: Torchlight Diaries, let’s talk about its sequel, Beach Babes 2: Cave Girl Island!
As with the first entry of this duology, Beach Babes 2 is directed by David DeCoteau under one of his many pseudonyms, Ellen Cabot. Unlike the first entry, this movie doesn’t draw the relatives of famous actors to fill out the cast. No Joe Estevez, no Jackie Stallone, no Don Swayze, no Joey Travolta. There’s not even a Burt Ward or Linnea Quigley. I’m sure that will have no significant effect on the sequel.
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