She told me that she loved me, and like a fool I believed her from the start. She said she’d never hurt me, but then she turned around and broke my heart. Why am I standing here missing her and wishing she were here?
She only did me wrong. Hey! I’m better off alone. She devoured all my sweet love, took all I had and then she fed me dirt. She laughed while I was crying. It was such a joke to see the way it hurt.
Wait… What’s that? We’re not talking about the opening song to the 1967 album More of The Monkees written by Tommy Boyce and Bobby Hart? But we’re talking about She right? Ohhhh, the 1985 post-apocalyptic comedy action flick starring Sandahl Bergman? Ah ha! I gotcha. That does seem to better fit the B-Movie Enema blog website than individual songs on random albums from, like, almost 55 years ago.
It’s the long awaited return of stone cold babe Patty Mullen and the even longer awaited bow for horror-comedy maestro Frank Henenlotter!
Henenlotter is best known for his Basket Case trilogy along with this week’s B-Movie Enema feature, Frankenhooker. Henenlotter was inspired by the exploitation films of 42nd Street in his home town of New York City. He loved these films growing up and he copied a lot of the camp and the gore of those films while also not passing up the opportunity for a little bit of sex.
After making a third Basket Case movie in the early 90s, he turned his love of the offbeat and oft-forgotten films of 42nd Street and get involved with the new boutique video releasing company Something Weird Video. He set about becoming an expert historian of exploitation and gory horror and was instrumental to the restoration of those long trashed movies of his youth. Shortly after returning, he began making documentaries. Herschell Gordon Lewis: The Godfather of Gore, one of the documentaries he made shortly after returning to film, is a goddamn treat. I recommend that to any fan of schlock filmmakers and movies.
We’ve got ourselves a trio of sexy scream queens for this week’s B-Movie Enema!
This week’s movie, Nightmare Sisters is one of only two films that featured all three of the 80s main ladies of b-movie horror – Linnea Quigley, Michelle Bauer, and Brinke Stevens. The other movie? Well, that was Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama. It should be noted that not only do those two movies featuring every teenage boy’s trio of preferred prom dates appear together, both movies were directed by our good friend David DeCoteau.
Now… Last time we saw ol’ Dave around here, it was the very disappointing Beach Babes 2: Cave Girl Island. It was very clear to me that there was hardly a script and hardly any budget. This time around I know there is hardly a script and zero budget. In fact, this movie was filmed in only four days. When you know these things going into your succubi movie, you’re going to view the movie through a much sharper lens. I mean, I expected a great deal out of Beach Babes 2. However, this time, knowing this is a weekend project and, well, having seen this movie before, I know what to expect.
As 1983 dawned, Jess Franco was a man on a mission… He was going to make 16 movies.
Let that set in. SIXTEEN MOVIES. Quentin Tarantino won’t make 16 movies in his career. Okay, sure, one or two of them were not directed by him, but he produced and/or wrote them. What the fuck ever. He was making more than one movie a month. Okay, sure, most of them didn’t have much of a budget, or much of a costuming department, or a story. What the fuck ever. He was plowing through movies on his way to his most productive year in his incredibly productive career.
So, in February of 1983, he released one of those 16 flicks in Spain – Night of Open Sex. This is our fourth entry in Lina Romay Month here at B-Movie Enema, and this one might be a doozy. You see, Night of Open Sex isn’t quite like the previous entries this month. Oh no. This movie is actually a Eurospy thriller comedy caper. How does any of that work? I dunno, but here we are.
Let’s check back in with 70s horror exploitation, shall we?
But let’s mix it up a little bit too by going north of the border to Canada! But this isn’t just any ol’ Canadian filmmaker and cast, oh no, dear Enemaniacs… We’re getting director Ivan Reitman for this week’s movie, Cannibal Girls! Now, if that name sounds familiar, it’s because he was the producer of David Cronenberg’s fantastic Shivers and Rabid. And if that’s not enough for you, he was then a man of mighty hits in the 80s with Stripes, Twins, and a little movie called Ghostbusters (and its sequel). So, yeah, he’s a big freakin’ deal.
But yeah, he got his start doing exploitation. But with Cannibal Girls, we kind of get some classic exploitation horror tropes that are almost uniquely 70s in its flavor. This is a type of situation where we have a young couple, or group of people, who are traveling and all of a sudden their car breaks down or they make a stop someplace out in the middle of nowhere, or at least in an unfamiliar place. There, they come across maniacs or… worse. Like cannibals! This is the sort of thing that mostly became popular post Texas Chainsaw Massacre, but it wasn’t exactly new at the time of its release.
Oh boy. Here’s the conclusion to Full Moon Fever II: Torchlight Diaries, and… I already have questions from just looking at the trailer. But we’ll get to those many, many questions I have in just a moment.
This week’s movie is Virgin Hunters 2. This is a sequel to a rather fun little mid-90s sex romp comedy that I covered already. That was a legit movie made for the top shelf of the video store with legitimate story, cameras, probably actors, and maybe some good jokes in there too. I remember that film kind of fondly. It was a simpler time in 1994.
But Virgin Hunters 2? This is confusing as all get out. So the movie supposedly came out in like October 2016, right? The Full Moon website says that. The back of the box says that. But the back of the box also says the movie’s production date was 1985. But the trailer looks like the mid 90s (which was around the time the first came out), and starring people of the time (more on that in a minute). Also, look at that shot-on-video quality of high end Playboy TV productions.
It’s the second episode of the smash new series – B-Movie Enema! This week, Dr. Geoff Arbuckle, B-Movie Proctologist extraordinaire, and his trusty sidekick, Nurse Disembaudee, watch the fun 1989 monster comedy My Mom’s a Werewolf!