Blue March continues with not only another adult film, but an adult film directed by Anthony Spinelli. Spinelli was kind of known for his work in genres. Hey, it’s not just a prono, it’s a sci-fi/drama that deals with relationships and kinks and sexual inadequacy. This isn’t just a skin flick with a really hot redhead, it’s a film noir/crime drama type of movie too!
Dixie Ray Hollywood Star is the latter. We have a hot, but enigmatic redhead movie star, Dixie Ray, played by Lisa Deleeuw. She comes into contact (both figuratively and literally) with P.I. Nick Popodopolis, played by superstar adult actor John Leslie, who is caught up in a mystery after finding a dead woman on his floor.
Even better? This movie has the one, the only, Cameron Mitchell!
I didn’t mention this previously, but Dixie Ray Hollywood Star also, like many adult films in the 70s and early 80s, had two different cuts. The X-rated, original cut, and an R-rated version that could be shown in slightly more mainstream ways. Some of those might have played in grindhouse theaters and, later, even on late night cable. I certainly hand it to Vinegar Syndrome for restoring both cuts, if they exist, for most of their adult films. It gives me a chance to play one of them for the family when they come over for the holidays.
I have not seen my family for several holidays.
But, seriously… I watch the full-on X-rated versions for you, dear readers. Look, I get it. You don’t want to directly ask me, a stranger and your humble author of these fine, entertaining B-Movie Enema articles to watch smut for you. I understand that because you are all fine, upstanding men and women in society. I watch these smutty, dirty, sexy movies full of boobs, sexual intercourse, and hot babes as my sacrifice to you. For without you reading this article, I would simply be a very lonely, sexually frustrated man watching porn by himself and writing, oh, probably around 2500 words or so on this 36 year old blue movie.
That’s how much I like you, my dear friends.
So the movie begins with some soft focus, a melodramatic score, an old office building with a man in a suit and fedora walking to the office of Nick Popodopolis. This sure does make you feel like you’re watching an old school noir film. Like any good mystery, we can hear a verbal disagreement, heightened levels of voice volume, and a gunshot. Cut to black and a title card saying it is February 12, 1943. And our man Cameron Mitchell arrives. He’s playing “The Lieutenant” and he seems to need a few words with Nick.
The Lieutenant asks Nick why he might have his revolver out in the open. He shows the Lieutenant and his partner the lady in the corner of his office. Apparently, this is the second stiff in a week that Nick’s had in his office. The girl is Dixie Ray’s secretary, Adrian, who visited him that afternoon.
She feels him up, he gets a bone, and she sucks his dick. I mean she gobbles it. Apparently she is a lesbian but still loves cock. In fact, she tells him how good she used to be at oral. I guess Nick was offered an opportunity to get a nice payday from Dixie Ray. This would be as long as he didn’t tell the cops about a guy who was killed. I presuming this is the guy at the very beginning they are talking about. Nick says that despite this guy being a turd, he has to tell the cops. This will likely lead to Dixie’s arrest and that is something Adrian can’t have. She pulls a gun on Nick and threatens him. She demands a negative from him that incriminates Dixie. He draws his gun and when she shoots (and misses), he accidentally shoots her dead.
Nick continues to explain to the cops that he was first contacted by Dixie’s people while he was fucking around with his secretary before she left town.
This movie is less than 20 minutes old and Nick’s gotten a couple blowjobs from a couple hot blondes. He must lead a horrible life. This time he doesn’t get to climax as he is interrupted by a call from Mrs. Charles Barkley. Maybe she’ll be the Round Mound of Rebound (Sex) for Nick.
Just kidding, it’s spelled Barclay. Also just kidding on Nick not getting his rocks off. He hangs up the phone and fucks his secretary on his couch.
I will say that unlike SexWorld or Dracula Sucks, this movie is much lighter on the plot in these first 30 minutes or so. Stuff has happened, but it’s also a lot of John Leslie fucking and getting sucked off. The other two had a story to tell and ideas to explore (or at least in SexWorld there were ideas to explore). If you are looking for something a little more like the modern day porn, Dixie Ray Hollywood Star will probably satisfy that a little more.
Nick goes out to see Mrs. Barclay – who is actually Dixie Ray. She explains her husband has some pictures of her from a sex game that she and Mr. Barclay would play. She gives Nick the negatives of the pictures to hold onto. Despite the negative being in their possession, she’s concerned about prints that are floating around that is leading to her being blackmailed for $50,000. She can’t really afford to pay that amount. Nick is intrigued by Dixie not wearing panties in the pictures. She intrigues him further by saying she never wears panties. To prove it, she lifts her dress. Now I’m intrigued to learn that, yes, indeed, Dixie Ray is a redhead through and through.
Nick goes to a hotel where Charles Barclay is posting up against Dominique Wilkins and finds only a girl in the bed. She teases Nick until he roughs her up a bit to find out where Charles went. But they make up by fucking.
Nick is probably the grandfather to everyone living in the Los Angeles and Hollywood area. No shit. He’s gotten blown by a lesbian. He fucked his secretary (after being blown by her). He’s been promised the sex from Dixie Ray upon completion of whatever job he’s being paid to do with these negatives. Then he’s fucked Barclay’s side piece in Barclay’s own hotel room. I mean… Holy shit dude. I’ve seen more of your balls pumping in and out of women than I have your investigation.
As soon as Nick gets back to his office, he gets a call from Dixie to go back out to her house for something or another. Really it’s just for the movie to shift focus back there so we can watch Adrian eat out Dixie. I’m not opposed to this plan for the movie. Anyway, so Nick gets there, and Dixie says they had unfinished business after he tells her of the girlfriend her husband had stashed at the hotel. We find out that the little girlfriend Nick fucked at the hotel is Dixie’s daughter from her first marriage, Leslie.
While Nick gets another blowjob, allow me to tell you a bit about the actress playing Leslie. Kelly Nichols (who we saw above with mussed hair and getting the D from John Leslie, but much more put together to the right) still works to this day as a makeup artist for adult features. She was an actress in several X-rated films herself and even had bit and uncredited roles in movies like C.H.U.D. But ol’ Geoffrey here knows her from her very first film, 1978’s The Toolbox Murders. Incidentally, not only is Cameron Mitchell the star of that exploitation horror flick, but I also plan on featuring it here on the blog sometime later this year. Let me just say that she left an indelible impression on me thanks to her bathing habits. In other words, she masturbates in the bath before being killed. But more on that later.
So Nick blows his wad, and leaves saying he still wants to fuck Dixie. Leslie thanks Nick for not giving away that she was the woman Charles had stashed and that she legitimately loves her stepfather. Nick is a bit indignant of that and gets a fresh one from Leslie. Upon his return to the office, Nick is roughed up by a couple tough guys who demand he gives them the negatives of Dixie’s sexy photos. He successfully tells the toughs that the negatives are not in his office. They beat him up just a little bit and tell him that wherever the negatives are, he better destroy them so that he can’t make any more prints and go into business for himself.
Nick goes to talk to the toughs’ boss who runs a nightclub. He has this performer there named Sherry. I bet you cannot figure out what happens next… Well, first, the guy tells Nick that they weren’t trying to shake Dixie down for any more dough. While Charles is missing, the guy figures that he has something to do with all this. Nick leaves and goes home. There, Sherry shows up with another girl from the nightclub. Now, we can get to the guessing game of what happened next…
Nick plows Sherry while the other girl begs for him to fuck her while he looks at her like he’s trying out for the “Hungry Like the Wolf” video.
I have to imagine that Nick is telling the entire details to Cameron Mitchell. Probably even acting out some of it too. Just picture that for a second. Like he’s saying “Ooh and then this broad brings her friend over and I tell her to beg me to fuck her like I’m fucking this other bird, right?” and he’s also humping the air and pretending he’s slapping a chick’s ass and stuff. But then what is Cameron Mitchell doing on the other end of this story? Is he just cranking one out over the exploits of his private investigator friend or is he just sitting there, mouth agape, at the story he’s being told or is he planning on arresting Nick for being an obvious sexual predator or something? WHAT IS CAMERON MITCHELL DOING WHILE HE IS HEARING THIS STORY?!?
Also… This movie is called Dixie Ray Hollywood Star. Where is Dixie Ray? I’ve seen her for exactly like 3 scenes. She flashed her muff on the beach to prove she doesn’t wear panties. She had sex with her secretary. She blew Nick. That’s it. What the shit, movie? What the actual shit?
Alright, so Charles finally calls Nick. He explains that he has nothing to do with blackmailing Dixie. He also says that Dixie is the only one who participates in the sex games and that’s why he left. He says that Dixie’s behavior has become problematic lately. They agree to meet, and when Nick gets to the hotel room, he finds Barclay dead. Someone knocks Nick out and he barely escapes in time before the police are let into the room to find the dead body.
He explains Dixie’s plan: First, she had to find out that Nick doesn’t carry a gun. Next, she had to make it so he would have to carry a gun, hence the thugs beating him up. Then, she had to switch his gun so they can frame him. To distract him, they had to get him laid… A LOT. Next, her secretary had to eat some beef taco… Wait, that’s just what the movie switched to while Nick was explaining the elaborate scheme. Whatever. The point is, Dixie Ray is behind everything and Nick was to be the pawn and the fall guy all at the same time.
But hey… Lady 3-way.
So here’s where we circle back around to the beginning of the movie. The dead guy and the deal in question when Adrian came to Nick and sexed him up a bit is Charles. Tell the cops that Charles was murdered by a scheme planned by Dixie Ray, and he’s got problems. However, don’t tell anyone anything and he can have some money. Cameron Mitchell explains that Dixie will likely get a good enough lawyer to get her off after she explains all the stuff done to her daughter. Nick is incensed by this. He hates the idea that just because she has some money, she cannot be held accountable for murder.
In the end, Cameron Mitchell believes Nick and says he is going to arrest Dixie Ray and it will be all a-okay!
Here’s the deal. This isn’t a very good movie… At least in comparison to SexWorld. That had ideas, things to explore (not that kind of exploration). It had more than just a bunch of fuckin’. This is just wall to wall ballin’. Some plot is in there, but I cannot imagine what the R-rated cut, It’s Called Murder Baby, can actually be besides about 15 minutes long. There is some old fashioned good vs. bad ideology in the movie, but it’s thin at best. The end basically plays up that idea of good and bad by reminding us that the movie takes place in the midst of World War II.
There are, to be sure, some definite good things in this movie. There are steamy scenes, but it does feel a little less like the classic smut and more like the present day porn-for-the-sake-of-porn type stuff we’ve seen over the past 25 or 30 years. But then again, not because it’s mostly just one guy getting laid by different people with some lesbian stuff thrown in.
I’m hoping to get back on the right track for why I wanted to do Blue March as we get to next week’s feature. It’s time to bring Johnny Holmes back. Not only that, but how about some nazisploitation to boot? Or maybe that should read “how about some nazisploitation das boot?” Anyway, it’s time to become a true Prisoner of Paradise. See ya all next week!