Nightmare Sisters (1987)

We’ve got ourselves a trio of sexy scream queens for this week’s B-Movie Enema!

This week’s movie, Nightmare Sisters is one of only two films that featured all three of the 80s main ladies of b-movie horror – Linnea Quigley, Michelle Bauer, and Brinke Stevens. The other movie? Well, that was Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama. It should be noted that not only do those two movies featuring every teenage boy’s trio of preferred prom dates appear together, both movies were directed by our good friend David DeCoteau.

Now… Last time we saw ol’ Dave around here, it was the very disappointing Beach Babes 2: Cave Girl Island. It was very clear to me that there was hardly a script and hardly any budget. This time around I know there is hardly a script and zero budget. In fact, this movie was filmed in only four days. When you know these things going into your succubi movie, you’re going to view the movie through a much sharper lens. I mean, I expected a great deal out of Beach Babes 2. However, this time, knowing this is a weekend project and, well, having seen this movie before, I know what to expect.

What it is that I know about this movie is that this is kind of a classic little wish-fulfilment-turned-bad sort of story. Our three lovelies are socially awkward sorority sisters. They each have things that us studs like me would find unattractive. Quigley’s Melody is buck-toothed. Stevens’ Marci has dorky glasses. Bauer’s Mickey is chubby. When a party meant to have them hook up with equally awkward dudes starts to fizzle, they try something else to keep the boys around.

Before we dive into this movie, let’s take a look at our three beauties. Linnea Quigley is maybe the most recognizable to most people today. She was in bigger movies, smaller movies, more notable movies, and movies like Nightmare Sisters. She had been in movies since the mid-70s, but in 1984, she was in Silent Night, Deadly Night in which she was impaled onto an elk’s head on the wall. The very next year, she played the punk girl Trash in The Return of the Living Dead. Even if you didn’t know her, you know about her naked dance in the cemetery. Of course, she was also in past B-Movie Enema features Vice Academy, Night of the Demons (both of them), and Witchtrap.

Brinke Stevens was the one I always think of as the “good” girl. I don’t know why. It’s probably because of her brief role in The Slumber Party Massacre. She dies before the actual titular slumber party and she seemed happy and innocent. She then appeared in the “Most Dangerous Game” style, titty survival, sci-fi/action flick Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity. The other film I’ve looked at on the blog that she appeared in is the slightly less mature Transylvania Twist.

Interestingly, the one I’m most attracted to, Michelle Bauer, has not appeared in a movie I’ve covered here yet. She was a Penthouse Pet of the Month in 1981. After that, she starred in a few pornos. However, Bauer didn’t perform the sex scenes. She didn’t mind being in the movies. She didn’t mind being on the covers of the tapes. She did demand a double to actually do the sex shots. She later showed up on Playboy Channel. However, her centerfolds in Penthouse led her to getting opportunities to appear in movies. Fred Olen Ray offered her parts if she’d dye her hair black – which is funny because she already had darker hair as it was.

The movie opens with two over the top characters – Omar the fortune teller and his customer Amanda Detweiler. He has a bonkers Indian accent. She has a silly southern accent. She’s asking about her husband who has been seen with another woman on a business trip. However, the next morning, the hotel maid found no sign of either her husband or the mysterious woman. All that was found in his room was 50 pounds of ashes along with his gold watch and gold necklace. She says they are very valuable and would never go anywhere without them. She believes something terrible has happened. Omar, naturally, wants to hold onto the watch and necklace to study the “psychic energy” that he claims is surrounding the items.

Omar plays up his connection to the spirit of Clinton Detweiler in his performance and it upsets Amanda. So he basically convinces her that Clinton was indeed cheating on her. However, things take a different turn when he starts carrying on that Clint is gone and “she” sees him. He begs for “her” to go away but, all of a sudden, two gross arms come out of the crystal ball and tear Omar’s head off his body.

Our movie officially begins with an introduction to our titular Nightmare Sisters. Melody tries singing and playing piano, but is pretty shitty at both, Mickey is seemingly always working out and eating sweets in rotation, and Marci is addicted to buying junk at the flea market. Melody is worried that Marci’s hobby will get the other girls in the sorority mad at them because they could barely get in as it was. Mickey is a little less worried and more supportive saying, that since they don’t really have boyfriends (though Melody claims she does have a dude), they need their hobbies.

I’m going to go ahead and say this – the girls weren’t quite uglied up enough for me to say they aren’t still attractive.

One of the items she bought was a goblet made from an upside down skull. Another item that Mickey takes interest in is the crystal ball Marci bought. Turns out that Marci has the crystal ball that Omar owned that the scary monster hands came through and tore his head off. When Marci explains that she was told the medium died, Micky gets scared and talks about watching a movie about people who raided an Egyptian tomb only for it to awaken an old vampire lady that hunted them down.

For eagle-eyed viewers, she’s explaining the exact plot of The Tomb. That came out the year before this. Michelle Bauer, who, remember, plays Mickey, played the angry old vampire lady hunting the people who stole from the Egyptian tomb. Melody retorts that Mickey watches too many horror movies and “one zombie movie was enough” for her – a reference to Linnea Quigley (Melody) appearing in The Return of the Living Dead.

Well done, movie.

Just when you think that it seems odd that this sorority house is inhabited by just these three girls, Marci asks where everyone is. As it so happens, and not due to the tight four day shooting schedule and even tighter budget, the other girls are gone for the weekend. Most of them went somewhere neat or exciting with friends and family or romantic places with boyfriends.

Melody comes up with the plan to have a party. Of course, all the other girls are gone, so what are they to do? Melody says she wants to invite guys over. Marci points out that they don’t know any guys. But, never fear, Melody went on a date last month with Kevin. Kevin is a dorky dude who is quite shy. she had to put HIS hand down her shirt just to get something started. She calls Kevin and tells him to invite a couple of his frat brothers. Kevin agrees because even though he ran away from Melody after getting his class ring stuck on her bra strap, he was worried she thought he was taking advantage of her (despite her doing all the work). When she says that she really does like him, he’s quite excited.

Also, this trio is extremely adorable in these opening scenes. These are three actresses who are fairly well known for being sex bombs in their movies and they are just having a ton of fun playing against type. It comes off as sincere and natural. It’s just adorable.

Unfortunately, Kevin’s friends aren’t so excited about their dates. His pals are aware of who Marci and Mickey are. However, when three preppy members of Kevin’s frat come in and sees them fighting, they decide to fuck with the dudes. They even ground the trio from being able to leave to go to the party.

Unawares of this development, the girls get ready to have the guys over. As time passes, and the guys don’t show, Melody gets upset. Always optimistic, Mickey thinks they are just being fashionably late. But Melody thinks it is more likely they are “fashionably not coming over”. But leave it to Marci to find the most likely reason why the guys coming over by stating that “maybe they were run over by a bus”. I love these girls.

Suddenly, the guys show up by climbing out of the window of their room. Duane pairs up with Marci and Freddy pairs up with Mickey. However, since everyone here are awkward dorks, they don’t really know how talk to each other. Melody and Kevin decide to play the piano and sing “Row Row Row Your Boat”, but, like, way worse than Kirk, Spock, and McCoy did in Star Trek V. Marci shows family pictures. Freddy just talks like a crazy person while Mickey stuffs her face with potato chips.

Melody comes up with the idea to play Twister, but that just becomes a mass of flesh something on the level of Brian Yuzna’s Society or one of Clive Barker’s sexiest dreams.

“Let the shunting begin…”

Back at the frat house, the dickhead preppy guys discover that Kevin, Duane, and Freddy have escaped. They decide to go to the girls’ house, Tri Eta Pi. The guys and girls finish playing Twister and the boys think about leaving. Marci suggests they do a séance. Mickey does not want to participate. She’s legitimately freaked out by the idea. Freddy and Melody convince her to stick around.

When they begin to commune with the spirit world, what they find in the crystal ball is Omar. He warns them about communicating with the dead. However, he then tells the girls that they must touch the crystal to protect from the evil spirits that might come through to harm them. As they touch the crystal ball, they are enveloped by green light and are transformed…

Into total babes!

She’s All That, eat your heart out! The guys are pretty dang confused by what happened. However, the guys don’t even really remember exactly what happened during the séance. The girls take the boys to the kitchen to feed them the sexiest peach pie you’ve ever seen. Outside, the preppy members of the frat look into the window shocked at how these guys are scoring with these sexy chicks.

Honestly, if this scene was literally the rest of the 39 minutes remaining in this movie, I wouldn’t complain one goddamn bit.

But alas, there’s more business to be done here, boys. So those preppy frat boys, J.J., Bud, and Phil, well, they decide that obviously the only reason why these babes would be giving the goods to these dorks is because they haven’t met them. I mean, do duh, right? All they have to do is find a way for them to meet these girls and they’ll get that sexy, sexy peach pie meal.

The girls invite their dates to take a bath with them, but the guys, being dorky ass gentlemen, turn the girls down and decide to wait for them downstairs. Kevin says the reason he turned them down was that something weird is going on. They must have been possessed by something that happened in that séance. Of course, this is mostly explained while we watch the girls take a bath.

Again, if this was the remainder of the movie, I’m perfectly fine with that. However, this is early era David DeCoteau and he’s still got some kind of story remaining to be told. That story deals with Kevin, Freddy, and Duane trying to figure out what’s going with the girls, and J.J., Bud, and Phil trying to introduce themselves tot he girls.

The good guys decide it is best for them to “keep an eye” on the girls… a very close eye. Kevin warns that they shouldn’t let the girls touch them under any circumstances. So they will just watch them take a bath. The bad dudes outside, also watching the girls bathe, decide they need to do some covert shit to get rid of Kevin and his friends.

Despite Kevin telling the guys they need to steer clear of the girls, Mickey takes Freddy to her room where she’s got it set up like a jungle themed playroom. There, he watches her deep throat a banana. Marci, dressed as quite playful little girl, takes Duane to the backyard to play doctor. He convinces her to play hide and seek, which allows for the preps to snatch him and stash him in the garage. When Freddy escapes from Mickey, the guys grab him and one of them is grabbed by Mickey who decides to feed on him.

Eh… I’d still go for it.

Elsewhere, Melody decides to sing for Kevin. But this ain’t no piano ballad or “Row Row Row Your Boat”. This is a rockin’ song about a Santa Monica Boulevard Boy.

It should be noted that this song appeared in Linnea Quigley’s Horror Workout as well. It’s actually credited to the band The Skirts, which she herself sang with. Yup, Linnea Quigley is quite talented in many ways. Anyway, so Kevin and his friends have been captured and tied up in the garage. Kevin tries to warn Phil, the lead prep, about the girls being possessed, but he doesn’t listen. He thinks they are lying.

While that is going on in the garage, another of Phil’s jerks is making out with Melody in the living room. She asks if he’s ever done any acting. He says no. She says she wants to give him a “bit” part. He’s a little too late on figuring out the pun.

Now, in both instances the guys got their dicks eaten off. They erupt in to smoke and all that remains of the men is a pile of ash. Phil goes into the house to find him a piece of ass.

But the ass find him.

Melody is the first to cozy up to Phil, but is soon joined by Mickey. Earlier, Marci lamented that her meal got away from her, but her sisters are more than happy to share this frat guy with her. They take him to Marci’s room. Marci’s room is a living nightmare of completely unsexy proportions.

Eh… I’d still give it a go.

Marci goes to change into something more comfortable. She returns dressed as a dominatrix. We don’t exactly see what happens to Phil, but we see a shot of the hallway and hear repeated cracks of the whip and pained screams from Phil. Once the girls start to take it easier on him, he says there’s enough of him for all three of the girls. They like this offer and they bite into his dick groin and he is reduced to ash.

Duane suggests they get an exorcist. Kevin agrees. But where do you get one of those so late on a Saturday night? Why, the Yellow Pages, of course! So they call the guy and the exorcist hauls ass over to the sorority house. He gets the details from Kevin, Duane, and Freddy. When they talk about how they bite ding dongs and the victims crumble to nothing, the exorcist reveals that this is a succubus. There is likely only one, but it is probably able to possess the trip of girls. He can exorcise the succubus demon from the girls, but then they will have to fight the demon its true form.

So they capture the girls and set about doing the work of getting rid of the succubus. The exorcist primarily just yells at the succubus and tells it to beat cheeks. However, it’s not until he asks if it is too ashamed to show its ugly face does it leave the girls and present itself to our heroes.

And kudos to the prop buyer hitting up the Spirit Halloween stores during the early November clearance to score this ugly bitch.

She asks who dares challenge her, and the exorcist steps up and she just lights his cross on fire. He calls her a douchebag and throws some herbs at her, but it only makes her sneeze. Free from the succubus’ control, Melody tells Kevin that the source of her power is the crystal ball. If they smash that, she’ll be trapped in limbo for all eternity. Kevin snatches the crystal ball and destroys it, which does in deed lead to her disappearing in a relatively disappointing special effect.

The girls return to their original clothes, but they get to keep their new bodies. They celebrate by playing a fun, wholesome game of Twister while the ground where the crystal ball was broken glows behind them. The end.

What a charming ass movie. It’s easy breezy, funny, sexy, and ends in a real nice little date for these not-so-unattractive nerd couples. This is during what I call the best years of David DeCoteau. These are the types of movies that are perfect for late night cable that needs no quality outside a little bit of heart and elbow grease to just make a fun little movie. If I’m ever asked to name a movie that is absolutely in the barest of bare bones productions and still provides legitimate entertainment value, I would point you to three of DeCoteau’s earliest of films – Creepozoids, Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama, and Nightmare Sisters.

DeCoteau would continue this trend of doing these types of low budget, and, yes, low quality, films that still entertain for many years into the 90s. By the turn of the century, things would take a different turn for his movies. That’s something that discussed another time because it’s hard to really put that into true perspective without actually digging into one of his later stage movies from the past 15 years or so. Regardless, his work in the later half of the 80s and first half of the 90s is the type of stuff that just works for how base they are in their appeal to us guys’ more carnal needs.

Next time, things get a little catty around these parts as B-Movie Enema takes a look at Lucio Fulci’s 1981 adaptation of Edgar Allen Poe’s The Black Cat! Before then, get over to Facebook to follow the B-Movie Enema page. You also need to get onto Twitter and follow B-Movie Enema there as well. You should definitely know by now that B-Movie Enema’s YouTube Channel is where it’s at for both clips that I use here in the articles as well as episodes of B-Movie Enema: The Series. We’re only about 2 months away from the start of Season #2 so subscribe and get ready for those new episodes!

See you all back here in a week, my dear Enemaniacs!

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